Networking

Networking: Theory and Practice
by the Liberal Arts Dude

Just because I agree that networking is a good idea doesn’t actually mean I won’t find anything to grumble about. This article is about my gripes with the process and practice of using personal connections to find a job.

I agree with most job-hunting books that the best way to find a job is through the “hidden job market”--those jobs which are not advertised and are accessed primarily via personal connections and networking, rather than the relying on the traditional method of responding to want ads that are published in newspapers or the Internet. All the job-hunting books say it: 80% or more of job openings are not advertised and are filled by employers through word of mouth or by referrals from people currently employed in the organization. The key here, if you are a job-hunter, is to make contact with the hiring manager through personal connections and convince him or her that you are the right person for the job. Seems simple enough, right? In theory, yes. But in practice, it’s quite a different matter.

Theory: Using personal connections is an efficient process that leads to unadvertised job openings

That’s how it’s supposed to work. But in reality, personal connections don’t necessarily lead anywhere. Some personal connections can lead to people who know people who in turn, know people. It can be a maddening process just to get to the right person who will have the information you need. Sometimes it takes meeting three or four levels of acquaintances until you run into someone who has information that will be useful. The 5 o Clock Club says that you must expect to initiate 150--you read that right, one hundred and fifty--meetings with people in order to get ONE job. That’s a lot of people, a lot of meetings, a lot of time, and a lot to go through for one thing!

Imagine the trouble it takes to set up an informational interview with a busy professional. First, you have to find out about them either from reading or by people you know. Then you have to initiate contact with this person. If you get through their gatekeepers, you must make a good initial impression to them. Then you see if you can set up an interview at their convenience and take time off your own job (if you have one) to make that appointment. You research the person’s background and company just so you won’t appear to be a total idiot. You make up a script and several intelligent sounding questions. Then you show up at their office and talk with them. And according to all the books on networking, you’re not necessarily expected to come out of that interview with a good rapport with them, information on a job opening, or even any new information at all. If you do, that’s great. If you don’t then it’s a waste of time but all part of the game.

Theory: Most people will be more than willing to help you when you approach them

If you read most books that teach you how to do networking this is the impression that you get. In reality, however, some people will be willing to help or advise you. However, some people won’t. And the only way you will find out is to ask—and risk rejection. Some people won’t answer your e-mails or calls. Some people will act friendly at first but will back away when you start getting serious with your questions. Some people will be outright rude to you to your face. If you’re the shy and sensitive type networking will be twice as hard than for the naturally outgoing, thick-skinned types of people.

An important fact most would be networkers should be aware of is that “networking” has bad connotations with some people because in a lot of cases, personal connections have been abused. For some people a job-hunter who approaches them is an automatic prospective pain in the ass. Some people will see you as a “user” and you will come out of the interaction with them with a bad taste in your mouth because they made you feel as if your interest in them is based solely on their potential as a job-hunting contact. Which may be true, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a bad person.

Theory: Anyone can do networking—it’s easy!

The biggest aspect of networking I had to learn quickly to deal with is rejection. If you’re like me who is naturally shy, it’s a huge effort to put your best foot forward in a social situation and ask people for information. Much more so if what you are asking is a favor--which is essentially what you are asking of people when you ask their help in getting a job. Some people I will admit are naturally socially adept and dealing with people is very easy for them. Not for me. Just mustering up the courage to approach people is effort enough, let alone actually trying to enlist their help in your job-hunting efforts.

Theory: Using personal networks is always a better way for finding a job than want ads

In reality, networking is only as good as your network. If you (or your family) are well-connected and have some pull with lots of people in your chosen field, then yes, networking will most likely bear fruit for you fairly quickly. If you’re starting from scratch, however, and do not know anybody in your field networking can be maddeningly slow, cumbersome and frustrating. Just because you’re trying to network with someone doesn’t automatically mean they have a job opening ready for you. Or if they have, that they will be willing to give that information to you. Your success in networking is only as good as the quality of the network you cultivate. And if you don’t have a network in place then you must start from scratch--meet people, develop relationships with them, give them the impression that you’re not just there to use them, cultivate those relationships--all of this takes time and requires your relationship to mature to the point that both parties are mutually comfortable with you asking them for a favor. A more realistic view would be if you already don’t have a network in place, the job ads will still be your main source of information on job openings. Cultivate your network and possibly in a year it will be ready for job-hunting.

Final thoughts
The closest analogy I can think of for networking is dating. It’s a good idea if your goal is to find a mate. And there are lots of self-help books out there that teach you the basics on how to go about doing it. But deciding that something is a good idea is a lot different from implementing that idea in your life and putting yourself on the line on the effectiveness of the methods you have read about. Theory is always different from implementation. Networking, like dating, is a social exercise. It’s about attracting the right people and trying to get them to like you. Some people are just better at it naturally than others. But with experience and consistent effort you can get better at it just like any other skill. But the process of implementation could be a whole lot more painful and messy than self-help books make you realize.

Based on personal experience implementing strategies I learned in books on searching for a job through personal connections, I can honestly say this process isn’t easy. You put your ego on the line every time you meet a new person and try to get them to be a part of your network. You already risk rejection by employers in job-hunting. In networking, you also risk rejection from people whom you approach. It can be a pain in the ass, time consuming, and hard work. It requires a thick skin, social skills and comfort in social situations. But if you want access to the 80% of unadvertised job openings, you really have no choice but to grit your teeth and bear it.

In a nutshell, “networking” can be summed up as: being able to recognize and meet the right people; being able to talk a good game, being able to consistently make a good impression on people; and being able to absorb a lot of rejection. Basically, being a good hustler. For people who aren’t naturally hustlers or outgoing, networking can be very difficult. However, everyone to some extent must be able to do this if they want to be successful finding a job using methods other than the want ads. The realities of the job market require that we all learn the tricks and of trade of hustlers to some extent.

Networking: can’t live with it, can’t live without it.

© 2003